In recognition of the release of the Superman Returns DVD, I decided to rant on SMALLVILLE this week. Strap on your cape. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.



Everyone knows the story: a baby from the planet Krypton crashes to Earth and is taken in by humble farmers who raise him as their own. Like the name suggests, Smallville is the little town in Kansas where not much happens, until the meteor shower that hitched a ride with young Kal-El devastates the community and creates Kryptonite mutants from the town's people. SMALLVILLE follows the untold teenage years of Clark Kent before he came to be Superman.



I'll start by saying last year was a treat. It was tons of fun with storylines about invisible assassins, sorority vampires and the creation of the Fortress of Solitude. There were even some superheroes along for the ride, like Aquaman and Cyborg, and even the introduction of supervillain Brainiac played by Buffy The Vampire Slayer alumni, James Marsters.

Without a doubt, the best part for longtime fans was when Clark and Lana finally - FINALLY - hooked up. This was FIVE YEARS in the making, people! It was definitely a series high spot.



I'll give this year it's due. It began with a lot of promise. Clark escaped the Phantom Zone and defeated General Zod who inhabited Lex Luthor's body to conquer Earth. HOLY SEASON PREMIERE, BATMAN! Oh wait. Sorry. Wrong superhero. My bad.

The show went on to introduce Green Arrow in a multi-episode story arc, alien baddies escaping from the Phantom Zone and Clark pledging to begin training to fulfill his "destiny." Could this season be the year we finally see Superman???



Tom Welling makes a believable Clark Kent, he's earned that much. He's young, good-looking and ups the female viewership. He just CANNOT act. Like Derek Zoolander, he only has one look. Sorry, Tom, that's not going to cut it. And sure, he isn't the bumbling Clark Kent we all know from the Daily Planet - not yet - but is it asking too much to put the guy in a position where he's forced to prove his acting chops once in a while, perhaps honing Kent’s future theatrical clumsiness? Next to Erica Durance (Lois Lane) and Allison Mack (Chloe Sullivan), Welling becomes a red and blue coat rack. Which reminds me ... Note to Smallville Wardrobe Department: does it always have to be red and blue EVERY TIME? How many blue shirts and red jackets does one person need?!



That's just the tip of the iceberg or, in this case, Fortress of Solitude. The most recent episode was littered with problems. A storyline involving Clark and a "Zoner" (Baddie alien that's escaped from the Phantom Zone - Get it? Don't get me started) gets pushed to the wayside for a bunch of radio frequency tech-speak and the continuing saga of Lex Luther and Lana Lang's blossoming romance. Entirely too much time is devoted to them on a consistent basis and this time it wasted a perfectly good cameo by WWE wrassler, Batista, whose size and appearance had so much potential. There’s that word again. Potential.



SMALLVILLE has more issues than Action Comics has, well, issues. (That's 845, by the way.) Those viewers tuning in to catch any kind of comic book continuity shouldn't waste their time. SMALLVILLE has its own mythology outside the realm of funnybooks: Clark walks around without any dark-rimmed glasses, Green Arrow is a drug addict, who's Chloe again?

The show definitely raised the bar for itself last year. Luckily, it's early enough in the season that the show can still deliver on all the promise it built up for its fans. Hopefully, it can soon go back to being what it once was.

Being SUPER.

The TV Guyde