"Everyone will have 15 minutes of fame in their life"
--Andy Warhol


After an enjoyable week of hate mail, the Jopo is so back for Week #2. Now before I pick up my sh*t brush and paint another portrait, let's start off with a few words from my pal Webster:

CELEBRITY: a widely known person; 2: the state or quality of being widely honored and acclaimed

EXAMPLE:


This game is fun, let's try another one:

DOUCHE BAG: n: a small syringe with detachable nozzles; used for vaginal lavage and enemas

EXAMPLE:


Kevin Federline is enjoying the most fame of his dismal life and I cannot make any sense out of why this is. He's the classic example of a celebrity who has become such for doing nothing. Prior to shacking up with Britney, he was best known as a C-list dancer.

I'll be the first to admit that Britney Spears is a head case herself, BUT KEVIN FEDERLINE?

The guy looks awkward just standing next to her. He looks more like a pesky stalker who wants to get his photo taken next to a celebrity.



Then again it was Britney who sang "Sometimes I run, sometimes I hide, but all I really want is to hold you close".

Britney has had a tumultuous last few years. She's gone from the media questioning her about having a boob job to having the media wonder if she's got an STD from this guy yet.

In 2002, she broke up with longtime boyfriend and former 'NSYNC star Justin Timberlake



And Timberlake was quick to find a new teammate



Then came her infamous 55-hour wedding to the 'other' Jason Alexander in January of 2004. The marriage was quickly annulled.

Britney said the wedding was not planned and was a big mistake. But 6-months later, "Oops she did it again".

And boy what a catch she got…



She went from the guy who sings "Cry Me a River" to a guy who simply needs to "Bath in a River". Does anyone else find it funny how Britney used to preach how she would only sleep with here eventual husband, but when you get married every 6-months, your purity factor kinda drops, no?

But it gets worse for young Britney...



Oh right... the deadbeat has also had a few kids with another woman. At the time of their marriage, Federline's ex, Shar Jackson of "Moesha" fame (there's an oxymoron) was expecting their second child.

Somehow Spears saw something in this guy (because God knows she wasn't making Justin jealous at all with this guy).

Britney was even sweet enough to write a song about Kevin.

Kevin Federline may in fact be the 8th wonder of the world because I just don’t understand. He’s the definition of a "loser" and yet he has someone like Britney.

The couple is now expecting their first (well, Britney's first) child.

If there is any justice in this world, at least Kevin isn't getting what he bargained for.

He wanted this



But has to live with this



BOBSLED FACTOR (Going downhill fast): 9
He's the closest we have to a perfect 10 in terms of the bobsled. His saving grace is that he's married to a mega rich pop star (and contrary to popular belief she DID have him sign a pre-nup). One day Federline will wake up from this dream and it will all be over. Enjoy it while it lasts. He's currently working on a rap album, which is guaranteed to be the greatest piece of trash I ever enjoyed. I nearly collapsed when I read two days ago that Federline is teaching some dance classes during the day (there's a class action lawsuit waiting to happen). In the last year, Kevin Federline has become a household name, but so is 'garbage' and I don't know which smells worse. 15 minutes of fame is giving this guy too much credit. I give this marriage a year and then we'll never hear of Kevin Federline again. But who are we to stand in the middle of love? Maybe the two really are made for each other...



Leave your comments about whose 15 minutes you feel is quickly ticking or has already passed.

The JoPo